2004-10-13

You're Nothing to Society

so my friend... let's call her L lost her virginity to my ex boyfriend. it's fucking disgusting. if she calls me, i'm gonna tell her she is a fuck up and that he is worth nothing. i told my mom about it. she says she has nothing to be proud of and that it makes her look like a slut. all he ever does is use girls. and why would she want to lose her virginity so fucking young? i just can't believe she got laid before i did. she's uglier than me.

oh well.

lacie has been treating me really shitty lately. maybe i have been being shitty but she can at least tell me if she is mad at me or not.

the ugliest kid in the school has called me ugly twice. i was quite insubordinate when it came to school work.

and i'm so numb. somebody can bump into me causing me pain and it wakes me up. it's not that i'm asleep, it's that i lost touch with reality.

and i still hate myself. especially today. whatever i did to fuck up my friendship with lacie, i feel so shitty.

the end by the doors. and natural born killers is such a good movie. i want to be mallory. there is just something on that movie that i can relate to.

maybe the hate and the not giving a fuck.

turbogeek at 4:49 p.m.

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